Happy New Year!

A little late, granted, but I've been busy. And frankly, although I have a few things to blog about, I haven't quite got my thoughts in order yet. Too busy playing Guitar Hero III whenever I have spare time...

Still, in the absence of writing, I thought I'd share this with you. Clearly, the thought of beating up 5-year-olds warms the cockles of my heart.

20

Tagged by Gardenia

I wanted to write a wee rant about that cunt Tony Blair and how great it is that he has finally fucked off, albeit leaving our country in even worse hands in the shape of that other cunt Gordon Brown, who can't talk without doing some weird freaky thing with his bottom lip. Wanker.

But then Gardenia tagged me, so I guess I'll put that post off to another day.

1. WHAT WERE YOU DOING 10 YEARS AGO?
Getting ready to get married, more or less. Our tenth anniversary is only five weeks away.

2. WHAT WERE YOU DOING 1 YEAR AGO?
Christ, who knows. Working I expect!

3. FIVE SNACKS YOU ENJOY.
Cashew nuts, white chocolate, beer, pitta and hummus, sex.

4. FIVE SONGS YOU KNOW ALL THE WORDS TO.
The Saturday Boy (Billy Bragg), Stand and Deliver (Adam & the Ants), That Makes It Tough (Buddy Holly), Holidays in the Sun (Sex Pistols), Suspicious Minds (Elvis Presley)

5. FIVE THINGS YOU'D DO IF YOU WERE A MILLIONAIRE.
Give up work. Direct a movie. Put together a band and make an album. Travel a lot. Start an animal sanctuary.

6. FIVE BAD HABITS.
Do I have any? Snoring, apparently. Watching too much shit TV. Working too hard.

7. FIVE THINGS YOU LIKE DOING.
Spending quality time with the wife, especially eating out, watching a good movie, holidaying, takonad'ing. I also like blogging and watching good TV.

8. FIVE THINGS YOU WOULD NEVER WEAR AGAIN.
I dunno. I figure anything I wear is cool by virtue of my wearing it. Oh, except dungarees perhaps. Yeah, I'll never wear those again. Good job I gave them to charity!

I tag anyone who wants to have a go, but first to mind are Cappy, Milla, and RefPo.

A little light relief

About a month ago, Cliff at This Is This tagged me, but I only just realized a couple of days ago cos it happened to coincide with my holiday to Spain for Red's birthday.

Anyway the tag is Six Things Most People Don't Know About Me, and this is a mix of real-life people and blog people I'm talking here.

1. I was a mod. For a couple of hours for a segment of BBC TV's The Clothes Show. (That's me in the picture above.) This was at a time of my life when I used to do a bit of acting and directing. The other highlight was a double-bill fringe production in Covent Garden; half of it I was in, the other half I directed.

2. Obviously anyone who knows me in the flesh knows this: I'm losing my hair. Well, I've been losing my hair since about the time I started growing hair. I guess it comes to us all, and I've just got to live with it. That said, I have considered buying a wig. Not a toupée -- I'd never do that. A proper, full-on, theatrical wig. Long and dark; or short and blond and spiky.

3. I think there are certain things that don't belong in a burger. I'll come back to this in more detail in my next post...

4. Yesterday I made an appointment to get my next tattoo started. I'm psyched. It's with a tattooist I haven't been to before, and it's going to take up most of my right arm, covering up one of my old ones in the process. Red's paying for the first session for my birthday present. Ain't she lovely?

5. Most people don't know I've got a blog, or however many blogs I currently have. It's quite a few now, isn't it? I've told about four people, one of whom is family. As far as I know, none of them has told anyone else, and I'm pretty sure that none of these people ever visits. Not sure why, though.

6. I consider myself to be a romantic. Well, it's Valentine's Day, innit?

It's been a while since I did a tag/meme thing, and I won't tag anyone in particular. If you wanna do it, knock yerself out. Let me know, though, so I can come and take a look.

Book tag

Pickled Olives tagged me.

1. Grab the book closest to you.
2. Open to page 123, go down to the fifth sentence
3. Post the text of next 3 sentences on your blog
4. Name of the book and the author
5. Tag three people

The book closest to me is If Your Dog Could Talk... A training guide for humans by Bruce Fogle, which I'm using for reference/research.

There are just six real sentences on p.123, so the only one after the first five is: "Less conveniently, some dogs may also do the same with your slippers."

I won't tag anyone, but do it if you want to. Let me know if you do, so I can check you out. Cheers.

“Oh lovely tagland, it’s a wonderful brew / A tag for me, and a tag for you”

Pie at Stuplicated has tagged me, so here goes. Be aware that some of this is likely to be rather similar to the list at Red-Letter Day.

10 Years Ago: August 1996
Red and I were hanging out loads and doing lots of things that resulted in lots of lovebites (tee hee). Watching lots of films, too. It must have been around this time that I first saw Scarface and decided it so hadn't been worth the wait. What a stinking pile of poo. Lots of getting-to-know-you stuff. Good times. (They still are, but those first few weeks are crazy, aren't they?)

5 Years Ago: August 2001
Who knows? Probably on a beach in Italy, which is always great. Maybe if we'd know then what we know now, we would have been in New York...

1 Year Ago: 9 August 2005
Again, I just don't know! What does Red say?

5 songs I know all the words to
I know the words to shitloads of songs. To me the point of a song is that it has words. If you like the song enough you should know a good chunk of the words, no? Anyway, I digress...
"Whip in My Valise", Adam & The Ants
"That Makes It Tough", Buddy Holly
"Anarchy in the UK", Sex Pistols
"The Man in the Iron Mask", Billy Bragg
"I Ain't Mad At Cha", 2Pac

5 snacks
Chocolate Digestives and black coffee
Ciauscolo on crusty bread
Boursin cheese on Ritz crackers
Beer
Pitta and hummus

5 things I'd do with $100 million
Buy some wicked property in some great locations
Help out family and friends with their finances
Give to some charities that I respect
Build myself a great little cinema, or buy a lovely Art Deco one
Keep a little for a rainy day

5 places I'd run away to
New York City
Venice
Koh Samui
Some of those cool places that feature on Survivor
Anywhere with Wife

5 things I'd never wear
A toupée
A yarmulke
Dr Scholl shoes
A cock piercing
My heart on my sleeve (yeah, right!)

5 fave TV shows
Seinfeld
Quantum Leap
Oz
Survivor
The Simpsons (maybe?)

5 greatest joys
Wife
Tattoos
Good music
Good films
Animals

5 fave toys
Blogland
iPod
HD recorder
DVD player
Wife -- well, not a toy, but she is a doll ;-)

5 peeps to tag
Do it if you want.

More s-tag-gering facts

Well, I've been tagged again already - this time by A.C.T., returning the "favour", no doubt. And I, in turn, tag... Ranting Dullard, FourDinners, and The Wanted Man. (You don't have to do the "plus side" bits; I just threw them in to make each one look longer. Nowt wrong with a bit of extra length, I always say.)

Ten things that annoy me about my workplace/colleagues. Difficult this one, but here goes.

1. I work from home, so if there's work to be done, it's hard to ignore it. This can lead to late nights and early mornings. (Plus side: When it's quiet I can just do nothing!)

2. I work with Wife, so far too often we have off-the-clock conversations about work. (Plus side: We get to spend all day together most of the time. Awww.)

3. Some of my clients are totally unrealistic in their expectations, be it regarding schedules or fees. (Plus side: Some are not.)

4. Working at a computer all day can be hard on the eyes. (Plus side: Working at a computer all day means you are never too far away from blogging time.)

5. Some of the work I do bores me to tears. (Plus side: Most of it doesn't.)

6. Several clients are very very very slow payers. We are still waiting for payment for some work that we did more than three months ago. (Plus side: Some are very good and pay within just three weeks or so.)

7. Most of the time I feel undervalued by my clients. (Plus side: Occasionally I don't.)

8. Sometimes either Wife or I have to go and work "in-house" at an office. This necessitates the use of public transport and all the germs in the air coming from sneezy, sniffy, sickly English folk. (Plus side: Mostly we don't have to leave the house. Howard Hughes here I come...!)

9. We don't like to turn down work, money-hungry whores that we are. (By the way, we're not actual whores.) This can add to stress levels and the likelihood of long days. (Plus side: Mo' money.)

10. We almost never get time off to go on holiday. We look back fondly on those days when we were employees and the two-week holidays that that afforded us. In fact, no: we look back fondly on those holidays, not so much the working days that led to them. (Plus side: Look at all the money you save by not having a holiday! Yeah, I know, not much of a plus side, since holidays fucking rule.)

All about me (well, not really, but it’s something)

I got tagged by Camie, so here's the stuff. For my part, since I got tagged by a girl, I tag three girls: A.C.T., Candy Minx, and Red. (Sorry if "girls" sounds patronizing. It seemed better than women, females, ladies, or anything else I could come up with in my simple XY brain.)

I AM: A man with a plan.
I WANT: A long and happy life.
I HATE: Noisy neighbours.
I MISS: Fewer times than I hit.
I FEAR: Losing loved ones.
I HEAR: My noisy neighbours' kid.
I WONDER: Why some people have to be so fucking noisy.
I REGRET: Some things, but they have all helped make me who I am.
I AM NOT: A bad chap.
I DANCE: Infrequently.
I SING: Often, and not badly.
I SEE: That the sun is starting to come out.
I CRY: Not often, but I'm not afraid to.
I AM NOT ALWAYS: As chilled out as I'd like to be.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: The pages of books and magazines, kind of.
I WRITE: More business e-mails than I care to. Also often on my blog.
I CONFUSE: My wife, at times.
I NEED: To not get stressed quite so easily.
I SHOULD: Lose about 5 kilos (10 lb).
I START: As I mean to go on.
I FINISH: Most things that I start.