And now the Oscars

Best Film: No Country for Old Men
Best Directing: Coen Brothers, No Country for Old Men
Best Actor: Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood
Best Actress: Marion Cotillard, La Vie en Rose
Best Supporting Actor: Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men
Best Supporting Actress: Tilda Swinton, Michael Clayton

So, acting-wise, it seems the rest of the world is giving America a masterclass. No surprises there, given that most American movies these days don't require much work of their actors: hence they don't build their talents in quite the same way.

Controversial opinion maybe, and certainly I'm not denying that there are some great American actors out there. But most of those who are truly great have tried spreading their wings a little beyond their own comfort zones.

Truth be told, of course, No Country for Old Men was not the best film of the year. I mean, it wasn't even the best film of the year that I saw, and I saw very few new releases. It was okay, nothing more. Honestly, I thought Sweeney Todd was better, and you'll be able to read my review of that soon, over at that other blog of mine.

First, the Razzies

Worst film: I Know Who Killed Me
Worst actor: Eddie Murphy in Norbit
Worst actress (tie): Lindsay Lohan as twin sisters Aubrey and Dakota in I Know Who Killed Me
Worst supporting actress: Murphy in Norbit
Worst supporting actor: Murphy in Norbit
Worst screen couple: Lohan & Lohan in I Know Who Killed Me
Worst remake or rip-off: I Know Who Killed Me, based on several films
Worst prequel or sequel: Daddy Day Camp
Worst director: Chris Siverston for I Know Who Killed Me
Worst screenplay: Jeffrey Hammond for I Know Who Killed Me
Worst excuse for a horror movie (New Category): I Know Who Killed Me

Tomorrow, the Oscars.

Best Film Editing

Hey there!

I'm not likely to post over the weekend, but I have written an article on Best Film Editing for the Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB).

Why not go check it out?

Cheers, and have a great weekend!

Oscar day, part 2

So the noms are in, and No Country for Old Men and There Will Be Blood are the big hits by number of nominations.

I can't say I'm unhappy with this result. I've long been an admirer of the Coen brothers' work, even though some of their more recent output has been seriously subpar. Word is that No Country is a return to form, and I am looking forward to seeing it.

There Will Be Blood director Paul Thomas Anderson may well be dead to my wife, but I tend -- to my disappointment usually -- to give people second chances and the benefit of the doubt. I didn't love his last movie, but I certainly didn't hate it anywhere near as much as Red did, so I'll be more than happy to catch this film too.

So here are my hopes/predictions for some of the major categories, based purely on what I want and having no idea how good or bad any of the films or performances are.

I hope No Country for Old Men wins Best Picture
I hope Paul Thomas Anderson wins Best Director
I hope Johnny Depp wins Best Actor
I hope Ellen Page wins Best Actress
I hope Javier Bardem wins Best Supporting Actor
I hope Tilda Swinton wins Best Supporting Actress.

Nice to see Viggo get nominated for Eastern Promises, though, and Casey Affleck for The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, both of which are also on my to-see list.

Oscar day!

So today is the day they announce the Oscar nominees. At 1.30pm I will be sat in front of the TV, watching them unveiled live and then seeing what Mark Kermode thinks of it all. And then I'll be back with my own thoughts and maybe a few predictions, too.

Hasta luego, amigos.

And the winner is...

"Ooh," I hear you whispering, "the winner of what? Is he going to tell us the winners of the Oscars, or is he going to tell us who won his competition? Both are clearly equally important to this egotist."

Well, no, because the results of the Oscars being what they were, my little 20,000th-person contest is waaaay more important to me! Yay for egotism.

So, without further ado, the Nowtie goes to... Lee of studio-twenty-three fame! So, well done to her. She will receive -- if she's silly enough to give me her mailing address -- a bundle of goodies hand-made and hand-chosen by little ol' me. Maybe this is me trying to share the love à la Chuck Palahniuk.

Thanks to all who visited and revisited, and who continue to visit regularly.

Oh, yeah... apparently there was some movie award thing last night, too. Well, turns out I got 12 right from the list I posted on Saturday. Bear in mind, of course, that my list was not predictions but rather what I would have liked to see win.

My Oscar hopes

So, bring it on, Oscar. Let's see how many I get right...

And for those of you in the UK, tonight you can see David Lynch's great movie Lost Highway on Channel 4. My review is here, if that'll help you decide.

The Retro Oscars. You heard it here first!

On the subject of the Oscars, which is topic of the moment, I totally agree with those who say Scorsese deserves an Oscar, but I have a suggestion, since I think it's unlikely The Departed deserves one.

Marty S should be the recipient of the first-ever retroactive Oscar. I believe the Academy should fess up and start retracting some of the dumb Oscars they gave in the past and start awarding those films that were overlooked.

So, I say Raging Bull deserves a Retro Oscar for Best Picture.

Forrest Gump? No, I've never seen it, and I never want to. Will that prevent me from having an opinion? Hell no! Retract that motherfucking Oscar and give it to Pulp Fiction.

And so on. Good idea? Yes, I think so. What Oscars would you rescind, and in favour of which movies nominated the same year?

Note: If you need help, go here and enter the year you are interested in and click Search to find out what was nominated and what won in each category.

The Oscar nominations: my twopenn’orth

Yesterday afternoon, Salma Hayek came into my living room to tell me the Oscar nominations for this year. It was nice to see her, but Salma dear, what was with that godawful dress? You looked pregnant and ready to drop. (Don't even ask what's going on in this picture either, cos I sure as hell don't know!)

I'm not going to rehash the list in full, because that would be silly when you only need head over to Oscar.com to find everything you need. But I will say something about it all. Well, you knew I would.

Best Actor:
Fuck off, DiCaprio, you freaky cunting man-child. Sure, you once showed promise. Now all you think you need to do is put in a fuck-awful accent and Bob's your fucking uncle. Like I say: fuck off.

Fuck off, Peter O'Toole, you old no-good-acting motherfucker. That shit you pulled in Troy? You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Fuck off, Will Smith. Even though your Happyness movie was directed by a cool Italian director with some real promise, you bore the bollocks off me.

So I guess that leaves Forest Whitaker and Ryan Gosling. I hope Forest gets it. I've liked him ever since Smoke. Gosling boy: You were good in The Notebook, but I'm not sure it's your time yet, old son.

Best Actress:
Oh, has anyone mentioned that the Brits are coming? Fuck off.

Helen Mirren as QE2. Do I give a fuck? Well, other than the film's director being (apparently) the uncle of an author I worked with a few times, no, I don't much care. I guess that makes me three degrees away from Daniel Day Lewis, for those who like that sort of thing.

Winslet: Stop boring me, boring me, boring me.

Streep: Like, whatever.

Dench, I used to hate you. Sorry, but I really used to despise you when I was an angry young man. Now I figure you're okay.

But I really want Penélope Cruz to win, if only to see how fucking excited Salma Hayek gets then. She could barely contain her joy simply at La Cruz's nomination.

Best Supporting Actor:
This is a tough category, and as usual, it's the most interesting one. Thank the maker that that hammy old cunt Jack Nicholson ain't there; in his stead we get Marky Mark. Fuck off.

I'm hoping for Alan Arkin or that Hounsou chap from Blood Diamond.

Best Supporting Actress:
Sorry ladies, I have no opinion here, although it would cool to see Jennifer Hudson get it for Dreamgirls. I liked her in American Idol a couple of years back, and the fact that she's being recognized and that dull cunt Beyoncé isn't is music to my ears.

Best Director:
No David Lynch this year, unfortunately. Still, there's that Iñárritu bloke who directed Amores perros back in the day and 21 Grams. I hope he gets it. But against industry stalwarts Eastwood and Scorsese it might be a tough job. I'd also like to see Paul Greengrass get it for United 93. Well, you know, the Brits are coming. Stephen Frears probably has no chance.

Best Picture:
Having not seen any of these but hoping to see them all in the next month, I currently would like Little Miss Sunshine to get the gong, though I'm sure Letters From Iwo Jima must be great.

Word on this side of the Atlantic is that US fave Babel is a load of old bollocks masquerading as worthy cinema.

And you know I don't like remakes and think that Marty has lost the plot, so I shan't be rooting for The Departed either.

So, that's what I think. Thank you, and good night.

Spain and Oscars and stuff

Last night, Wife asked me, "Are you done blogging about Spain?" The simple answer was no, there are still a few things I will post, including both pictures and words, but I had wanted to get my Chuck post done, and I'd wanted to do a movie review off my growing list of movies to review. So there will be more Spain stuff. I have some nice photos to share, and I need to do it before Wife nabs some of my choices!

But in the meantime, I also have to pay tribute to the Oscars and the Razzies. The Razzies are, of course, the anti-Oscars, honouring those films that are the worst of the year's crop, and they were announced today. The Oscars will be announced at 1:30pm GMT tomorrow -- that's 8:30am New York time.

Apparently, the hot ticket (if you can call it that) at the Razzies is Basic Instinct 2. I mean, did anyone even watch that? The trailer looked so fucking awful, I wouldn't have touched it with a bargepole. Seven Razzie nods is the legacy thus far for this picture, so let's see how it does at the ceremony, to be held on 24 February. The Wayans Brothers' comedy Little Man has equalled this number of nominations.

Other films in the Worst Picture category, accompanying the two above, are M Night Shyamalan's Lady In The Water, dodgy and wholly fucking unnecessary US remake The Wicker Man, and BloodRayne, which stars that bird out of Terminator 3.

So, what's going to be nominated for the Oscars tomorrow? To my great shame, I'm a bit out of touch with new releases, it must be said. Still I'd expect to see nominations for both of Clint's big war movies, a few tips of the hat for Dreamgirls, and Apocalypto is sure to figure somewhere. I'd like to see David Lynch appear somewhere for Inland Empire, and that Borat movie making an appearance would be fun. Despite so many people raving about Scorsese's HK remake The Departed, I'd love to see it totally snubbed. Scorsese is all washed up, and he needs to stop working with that freaky man-child DiCaprio.

So, what are your thoughts -- if you give a fuck, that is?