Look at my package!

How often does one get a parcel in the mail that says this on it? Come on, now, you can't tell me it's an everyday occurrence... It came from Canadaland, y'know, from Captain Karen of the Good Ship HMS Swiftsure.


There were some skull mittens for both me and the missus. Sure, cynics among you might say, "But it's summertime, Mr * (asterisk), why would you want mittens?" To that I respond: "Yeah, but we have English summers in England. Of course I'll need mittens!" And they are damn toasty as well as tasty, Cap'n. And don't you think they look great on me doing my Raging Bull Skull impression?

But there were other goodies, too -- too many to show here, including chocolate-covered cocoa beans, a copy of Dostoevsky's Crime & Punishment, toys for Cat, and a typically Canadian fridge magnet (right). I have it on good authority that every home in Canada has at least one of these on their refrigerator. And they sit down on their kitchen stool staring at it lovingly while listening to the government-issued CDs (below) compiled by Karen for the purposes of mind control.



Thank you, Karen, for such a wonderful parcel. Big love to you. With our colour-coordinated skull mitts, Red and I would surely be the toast of our small town (if we ever dared to venture out among the natives, that is).